Ask any parent where a baby ranks in life milestones: Most would tell you that the birth of a child is one of — if not the — most important. And those first few weeks following birth are crucial for parent-baby bonding, from midnight cuddle sessions to baby’s first laugh. Both parents need that time with baby to hone their skills, from feedings to diaper changes and everything in between.
As with maternity leave, paternity leave is what makes it possible to learn these skills firsthand — and research has shown that fathers and non-birthing parents who take it are more likely to be involved in parenting for the long run and experience plenty of benefits, from a healthier heart to a longer life and better relationships with their partners.
Given all of these positives, nine out of ten American dads do take some time off following the birth of a child. But given the current state of our country’s family leave laws, exactly how much is less than in some other places around the world.
What are the paternity and family leave laws in the U.S.?
In the U.S., the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) is the only federal legislation guaranteeing leave to care for a newborn, newly-adopted child or an ill family member: 12 weeks of unpaid, job-protected time off for both parents.
And although around 90 million people are covered by the FMLA, 44 percent of American workers aren’t. Why? The law only applies to those at a company of at least 50 employees (within a 75-mile radius) who’ve worked for at least a year and a minimum of 25 hours per week, or 1,250 hours during the 12-month period immediately preceding leave. Simply eliminating this threshold would make an estimated 31.7 million workers eligible for the FMLA.
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Still, just because unpaid leave is available doesn’t mean many parents can afford to take it — especially in families where one parent is already taking advantage of unpaid leave. In fact, 66 percent of people who do have access to FMLA leave don’t take it because they can’t afford to.
Paid family leave, on the other hand, is up to the discretion of individual employers — but unfortunately, without a law on the books, only about 13 percent of U.S. workers have access to paid family leave. What’s more, paid parental leave is less common among the blue-collar employees who need it the most.
As for part-time American workers, even fewer have access to parental leave — just 6 percent of part-time workers. While in concept part-timers would use the time they’re not on the job to be with family, in the U.S. many working-class families piece together a living with a number of part-time jobs. So built-in leave for all workers is really the only way to ensure all parents get the time off they need to care for their newborn children and themselves.
For most Americans, this means that family leave is unpaid or a combination of cobbled-together vacation and sick leave.
Compared to the rest of the developed world, the U.S. does not stack up very well. In 1974, for example, Sweden became the first country to offer fathers the right to paid leave after childbirth and adoption. Swedish parents are currently entitled to a whopping 480 days paid parental leave, of which 90 days are reserved each parent.
How do paid family leave laws vary by state?
The good news: American attitudes toward paid family leave laws are changing gradually on the state level. There is increasing recognition that countries with the best economies have policies like paternity leave that support new dads, since women who have supportive partners at home are more likely to stay in the workforce. In the U.S., nine states plus the District of Columbia have, in fact, enacted paid family leave programs.
- California created the first paid leave legislation that went into effect in 2004. The law offers eight weeks of paid family leave for bonding with a new child birth, adoption or foster, or to care for a family member (which is defined as a child, parent, spouse or domestic partner) with a serious health condition. The typical benefit is 60 to 70 percent of your weekly salary up to $1,252 per week as of 2019.
- New Jersey’s law, which went into effect in 2009, offers 12 weeks of family leave for bonding with a new child (birth, adoption or foster, or to care for a family member with a serious health condition). The plan offers 85 percent of a worker’s average weekly wage (AWW), with a maximum benefit equivalent to 70 percent of the statewide AWW as of 2020. In New Jersey, a family member is defined as a child, parent, parent-in-law, spouse, domestic partner, civil union partner, sibling, grandparent, grandchild, any person related by blood or any person with whom an employee has close association that is equivalent of a family relationship.
- Rhode Island enacted a new law that went into effect in 2014 that offers four weeks of paid family leave for bonding with a new child (birth, adoption or foster), or to care for a parent, grandparent, spouse or domestic partner with a serious health condition. The weekly maximum benefit amount as of 2019 is $852. In Rhode Island, a family member is defined as a child, parent, spouse, domestic partner or grandparent.
- New York paid family leave for bonding with a new child (birth, adoption or foster, or to care for a family member with a serious health condition) went into effect in 2018. The benefit offers up to 12 weeks of paid family leave at 55 percent of your AWW, capped at 67 percent of the New York State average weekly wage as of this year. In New York, a family member is defined as a child, parent, spouse, domestic partner, grandparent or grandchild.
Washington, Connecticut, Massachusetts and Washington D.C., also have enacted laws. Oregon and Colorado plan to implement benefits over the next two years.
And while only nine states and the District of Columbia offer some type of family leave, there are still wide ranging restrictions for same-sex non-birthing parents. The nonprofit Lambda Legal has a help line and more information on their website to help LGBTQ people and their families better understand the laws in their state.
What should you do during paternity leave?
With so much incentive to take family leave, it’s easy to see why many non-birthing parents opt in — but we still have a long way to go, both by enacting federal paid leave laws and changing the culture that surrounds leave so that more parents feel comfortable taking it.
In the meantime, if you do have access to paternity leave, take as much as possible so you can play a more equal parenting role. Here are a few ways to make the most of that time off:
- Be a co-parent. Family leave is a great time to dive into parenting duties head-first and learn the ins and outs of taking care of your little one.
- Help with chores. Paternity leave provides ample time for shouldering some of the household chores (and there will be more of them with your new plus one!).
- Nurture your relationship with your partner. Plan an afternoon date with your partner and bring your new bundle of joy along.
- Connect with other parents. Not sure what you’re doing? Use family leave to connect with other parents going through the same experiences as you by joining a club or local parent's group.
- Take a break. Sure, there’s plenty to keep both of you busy, even if you’re both at home. But if you don’t take care of yourself and stay healthy, you won’t be able to care for your child, either. So switch off taking a bit of R&R, too.
- Write your elected officials. If your state does not already have a paid leave plan or if one is in the works but has yet to be passed, write your state senator and tell them that your state needs to take action.
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